Arranged Marriage…Part 2

As you are going to move ahead with my article, you might feel that I am against Arranged Marriages but that is not true…it’s just that I never understood the concept of Arranged Marriages…

Two complete strangers are supposed to live together just because their parents want them to be together…no one is bothered whether these two people actually want to live together or no…or whether these two people are compatible enough to be together for the rest of their life…here I am not talking about astrological compatibility, I am talking about compatibility between two people…for more read my article on COMPATIBILITY…one of the best article of my blog…

Now in India, our Parents the Great… believe that ‘shadi do parivaro ka Milan hota hai’ (marriage is bond between two families)…and that is why parents are always looking for a perfect family not a good life partner for their son or daughter but a GOOD FAMILY…now, Is this family going to live with your beloved child???…NO…Is this family going to stand for your child in rough phases???…NO, some of them might have passed away by the time actual married life kicks in…

Say What...
Say What…

The first year in Arranged Marriages is very different, boy and the girl are always on cloud 9…movies, dinners, shopping, gifts and flowers and what not to woo each other…girl’s also needs to woo their parents by law…now by the end of the first year, realitystarts kicking in…and by the end of three years you can actually say whether you are compatible to your partner or not…which usually doesn’t happen because in arranged marriages parents want to be grandparents within 9 months of marriage, so majority of the couples have babies within two years of marriage…and once you have a baby, you will never have time in this world to know your spouse…and just like that life goes on…after 10 to 15 years when you get some time to know your spouse, it’s too late, to take any step…you are mature and above all you have two kids to look after, so usually couples decides to move on with life without complaining…

LOVEWhat is that???is it related to marriage???… is totally missing in arranged ptg01515860marriages…but we hear from all these newlyweds, especially from girls that I love him so much…REALLY???do you even know the true meaning of love???…but actually it’s not their fault…we Indian Girls have this genetic disorder that as soon as any Tom, Dick and Harry  apply’s ek chutki sindoor  in any girl’s maang…the very next minute that girl will be ready to jump in the havan kund(fire) for him…believe me, all Indian newly married girls are that stupid…

(sindoor is red color powder worn by married women on their hair parting in India)

Now, you don’t know any single thing about opposite person and you can never know anything within four to five months of telephonic conversations…because that person might be faking so many things while talking to you on phone…talking and behaving couples_couple_bw_love_lovemaking_lovers-912862cf38ce4c5492ebb44c22b9bdb6_h-2723like a gentleman, giving gifts and roses every now and then…if you consider all these things as love, well…I am so sorry…please get a reality check…nowadays thanks to this media, this is what every man does to have sex with the lady…it’s the polite version of, ‘I want to fuck you hard you bitch’…SEX, they do it without any love, they want it by hook or crook…

Now coming back to the Arranged Marriages, 90% of Arranged Marriages are like the kind of relation you have with your pet…you might not like your pet on 1st day might be on 2nd day or on 3rd day…but on 4th day if it goes missing, you will start looking for it everywhere…Arranged Marriages are like that only, you get habitual…you don’t love each other, but over the course of time you become so used to each other that you don’t want to be without each other…now if that is what you call love, well wake up be updated…you definitely need to upgrade your knowledge about LOVE…

So far what I have observed , Arranged Marriages in my opinion is just  a hoax…you have to say yes for everything  and agree to every word even when you hate it from the bottom of your heart…you have to do stuff that you will never do under any other circumstances…you cannot be your true to yourself for a long time and in some cases may be never…everyone around you, your parents and in-laws, expect you to behave in certain way and you can never disobey them…try it, and you will get a whole twenty two hour long sessions of lectures on how to be a good wife and daughter in law…boys usually don’t get any lectures in India how to be a good husband…now the worst part of Arranged Marriages is this that, girls have to compromise a lot in comparison to boys…

And another thing that annoys me a lot and I cannot digest this thought of spending your complete life with a stranger…you are not love-chemistrysure about the compatibility and by the time the sun rises believe me it is too late…and when you talk about CHEMISTRY you can see a big question mark on their faces…and trying to prove that they know each other since decades…and I feel chemistry is the synonym of Love…

I would like to apologize if I have hurt anyone’s feelings but this is my true opinion about arranged marriage…I came up with this conclusion after years of observation and reading too many data and survey’s conducted by various government and private agencies… I am not against it but I can’t digest its concept…

I am not saying that you don’t get good partners in Arranged Marriages…if you are lucky enough, you might get a soul mate but that rarely happens in Arranged Marriages…

I have observed many couple in my family and friends, well I am the first alien in my family who have the balls to opt for love marriage…but jokes apart, I have observed it that marriage doesn’t depend on whether it’s arranged or love, both marriages go through same ups and down…for a successful marriage you need to respect each other which usually go missing after few years…you need to have compatibility and chemistry, which is usually absent in most of the marriages…

‘True lovers don’t marry someone they can live with; they marry someone they can’t live without’…you decide with whom would you like to be…I choose to live with the one without whom my life would become a big question mark…what’s your decision…

Love ❤ AARYA

 

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10 thoughts on “Arranged Marriage…Part 2”

  1. Aarya I agree but a lot of things have changed. Traditions are still there with a hint of modernisation. Parents are initially responsive for bringing I together two adults, but then they are allowed to meet and hangout to get to know each other. I’m talking about the minority here- the broad minded ones. In Pakistan. There are still people who marry to complete strangers to please tier parents but I guess parents also use tradition and religion to stifle their kid’s wishes.
    And yes sex is such a big part of everyone of us. And it gets really tough if you would like to be a tigress in bed but he’s you know not really into the tigress thing.
    You get what I’m saying right?
    I didn’t need the translations though. I know what sandoor is and you’re so right about the parivaar wala dialogue!
    Xoxo

    1. Hahaha…I get it Zareen 😀
      I agree people are changing in urban cities but percentage is very low…and about being tigress in bed…ah these men will think their wife is not a virgin…and they can stand anything in the world but a broken seal…is so not there cup of tea 😉
      Happy to know that you liked it 🙂

  2. Beautiful song! I guess 17 minutes is a bit long but not too long for a song you like.
    I get what you mean. Some lyrics speak out to us way more than others do. Most of the songs I like are because I can relate to the lyrics.
    But these days most songs are just meaningless. My milkshake brings all the boys to the barn doesn’t speak to me AT ALL!

  3. Wow!!!!! Though you already know my story a bit but his makes a lot of sense Aarya!!! Girl you write awesome! I was wondering if you can share my story with your readers!! And please i need suggestions so that i know where to go in life 🙂 🙂

    1. Don’t worry dear I will share your story on my blog…as it’s Veda’s day to write so I will to do it on Tuesday 🙂

      Are you on twitter…

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